what seemed like forever
and was perhaps
some lost sand
sifting through light
slower when observed
turning like eager sun dial
face capturing shape and shadow
as the moon faced women
blue in Picasso’s rough brush
your edges sleek impossibly
by Masters deft curve, mimicking
nature readily, surely as time will
erode the fullness of our cheeks
your high bones hold you up
that half smile imperceptable
through memory shaking her
coat free of rain drops
as we drift further into long night.
I recall being good at Tug of War
in school with my artex white shirt rolled up
the thin fabric of my skirt flapping
dangerously high, leaning in for the pull
boys on the other end heaving, purposing
(this was always about more than a rope you know)
their extraordinary need to dominate and
our quiet, tugging urgency to defy
even then I might have upset the historical balance
made you proud, if you’d been watching
the length of rope dipping into glassy water
with the weight of decades, days spent
trying to form words of consolation where none
seem worthy enough.
You have slim bones that cannot pull heavy
rope from weighted oceans and even if
your arms were strong, I wonder if you would
gather me to you, within the eye of rushing storm
our fragile satellites eclipsing, resolving
sorrow with gentle grace, unleavened bread
yet to rise
to feel your perfumed palm on my forehead
the beneficence of your gaze, or hear
your voice, its sonorous depths, call for
me and gladly, I would present myself
for any time in your light is time lived
well and good and whole.
in your absence there is only
shadow and cold
reminding me, estrangement is unnatural
when it pares two segments of the same orange
apart, with no mend, balm or eulogy
great enough to salve the hurt
building within us, mountains of
dried salt from spent regret grown
I long and shall always long
to return to you
in that hour where memory
we laughed and
in your eyes I saw
verdant and blooming
with the tender cobalt nectar
reserved for what can never
19 thoughts on “Je suis désolé de n’avoir pas été comme tu”
It is one thing to mourn for the dead, but to mourn for one still with breath and heartbeat and no less lost, that is quite another matter.
Reblogged this on cabbagesandkings524 and commented:
TheFeatheredSleep – Irreplaceable
Indeed. HappyNew YEAR dearest Bob I hope this will be a better one for us all. Any idea when you might be able to get your shot?
Thank you so much for this reblog my friend it means a lot to me
And a Happy New Year to you too. I missed you posting recently, but figured you’ve been a bit busy with 3, count them, 3 anthologies in the works. I have no word yet on when I’ll be able to get the shot. Our County Health Dept. here is understaffed and overloaded, but they hope to have a schedule out soon.
Hi Candice, and happy new year… Love your french ‘Titles’ that make me search for the translations… and this is full mystery and intrigue..”I’m sorry,I wasn’t like you”.. and here I am listening to Sivert Hoyem’s brand new song(out today), which seems to suit your poem… enjoy.. 😀😍
Your usual superb imagery
I was watching that on the news and despairing. My friends in France say the same is true there. It seems to me they should have thought about this in all the months leading up to the advent and distribution of the vaccine. I realize it’s easy for me to say that, but really, surely?
The part that makes it hard is I work full time as well so that combined with the editing – leaves me no time to write – i do miss doing so also
As for the COVID vaccine, the system here got a plan and vacine, so I’m scheduled for the first shot tomorrow. YAY!!!!
Maybe once the current anthology projects are off to the presses you’ll get a bit more writing time until the next inspiration hit the group.
YAY! Tell me how it went?
I hope so but my dance card for publishing is filled up for the next two years 😉
Thank you so very much I can’t wait to hear that song it sounds brilliant
I just got the first shot about an hour ago (the Moderna version). The community groups had the process well organized and easy process, very well done. I get the #2 on 2/17.
Wow! Well, I’m sure you will manage to slip a poem in here and there.
I’m so relieved you did! So relieved
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