Are you following Heretics, Lovers, and Madmen? I will wear red for my sisters whose health is at risk for my sisters who have been raped for my sisters who have been battered for my sisters who are already struggling to feed hungry children for my sisters who need to finish middle school high school […]
Are we free? The girl asked Her wrists were unshackled she did not have her hymen sewn shut or clitoris removed by a shard of glass so comparatively she felt like she ought to be free there were no brands upon her back nor was she jailed for loving another girl and sentenced to die […]
Don’t look away because you’ve already made up your mind
hang loose / stay nimble Kingfisher / remain open
this isn’t a soap box and I’m not ranting
this is a page among many pages and a thought among many thoughts
I hope you read it and T.H.I.N.K.
This is for the person who thinks women and girls shouldn’t have a choice
did I lose you with that last line? What happened to the certainty of your convictions?
If you are ready to condemn a rape or incest survivor to bearing their rapists child
and possibly having that rapist fight for custody/visitation and be awarded it
then consider how you might want to give me the time of day
before closing yourself off back to your old way of thinking
after all … I’ve changed my views many times based on EVOLVING
we don’t stay the same, we shouldn’t stay the same
life is not a vortex
so here goes …
What makes you believe a girl of 15 who is raped by her step father should
bear his child?
Because I hear you say on the radio; “The child is not to blame so we should not punish them by murdering them”
and the certainty in your voice
as I think of what it will feel like to be
raped at 15 by your step father, bear his child at 16 and then tell the child at 13 when she is old enough to know, who her father is
watch her face crumple
should that child never exist? She may go on to do great things that is true
But we are putting the rights and the acts of predators before the rights of that 16 year old
We are raping them again
We are telling them you may be an individual but you have NO right over your body
you were raped and now you are going to be given this life sentence
and your child will be too
and yes, that child may grow up to be something amazing
but sometimes we don’t need to know every eventuality
we just need to know what is wrong and what is right
and it is wrong to make a child bear a rapists child if they do not want to
just as it is wrong to give that rapist any rights over that child’s life
there is really … no punishment great enough for rapists and molestors
but we are going soft and we spend far more of our time
trying to undermine the rights of women and girls
and I have decided (call me paranoid if you wish) this is
a conspiracy against women and girls
and before you say “oh but other women think so too, it’s not just men!”
I will nod and agree, because I have seen and heard those other women
in fact one is my neighbor and she said; “I don’t understand why a person has to have an abortion they are just lazy because they did not use birth control”
and I wondered because she is a lovely person and quite bright
HOW she could think this and WHERE that judgment came from
but despite this, despite other women damming other women as they have always done
it is the masculine need to control women that is at the crux of this debate
it is the male led world (still) that tries to close its fist around women’s private parts
and tell her what she can do with her own body
and it is the misinterpretation of what we perceive God to want and dictate
that leads us to condemn, insult, hate, shame, loathe, obliterate
the rights of other women to do what THEY NEED TO DO
and sometimes what they need to do is
have an abortion
and it’s not only in the cases of girls who have been raped by their step fathers
but mothers and wives and adults and middle aged women
who for a variety of reasons have decided
as human beings they have the right to decide what to do with their own body
and if there were a war and there were two sides
and someone said to me; will you fight for our side
despite being a pacifist I would
because I have worked with the women and girls who have come to me and said
my parents did not let me have an abortion when I was raped by my uncle
I had to bear this child and that child grew up knowing I hated it
though I tried not to
and I was condemned again for hating the product of my rape
although I could not stop myself
too much of the burden is upon the women
and I do not think those grey haired men who sit in judgement
would wish to adopt my child of rape or your child of rape
I do not think they would wish to have a child of color
or a feminist or a lesbian as their child
I think they want to turn the clock back to when
women did not speak out or wish to assume any control
of themselves or their daughters
what they do not understand is
before their time
women were in control of themselves and their daughters
and they flourished
until they were defeated
but as with any battle
there can again be
and I suspect the time is coming
when women will once more (they should not have to)
rise up they should not have to)
and say (they should not have to)
to their daughters and their sons (they should not have to)
this is not okay and I am not going to lie down and take it
and when that day comes
I will be part of that battle
and would die defending
the right of women and girls to do what they want with their own bodies
and those who will come at me with
what about the babies rights?
what about the rights of the unborn?
what about how murder is wrong?
will hear me reply
what about your cruelty? Enforcing laws
draconian and otherwise upon the bodies and souls
of women and girls
all because it comforts you to judge
rather than yourselves
and who is saying anything about
the men who get women and girls pregnant
and how often they do not want
to be saddled with a child
and this is my last thought on the matter;
What would men do if they were the ones who were
raped and abused and what would they do if they
could become pregnant and had to carry a child
and were told by women
oh you should carry this product of rape to term
and give it up for adoption because it is selfish of you to abort and it is murder
when there are so many childless couples who would be so glad of your
birthing factory abilities, sorry, I mean, unwanted child
what would men say if they were told
I am sorry you were forced to have sex and got pregnant
but you cannot have an abortion
be mindful of the sanctity of life in this overcrowded world
and shut your legs in future
the undertone, it is all in the undertone
and I say
if men were to wake up to that?
there would be abortion clinics on every corner like Starbucks
and that more than anything else tells you what you need to know
if you are still listening
and not assuming you know
what women should do with their bodies
because you possess
the moral imperative
Indie Blu(e) Publishing will be releasing an Anthology of Lesbian Poets later in 2019. Themes of this Anthology will include identity, coming out, relationship, family, love, loss, and sensuality (rather than graphic erotica.) The deadline for submissions is June 16, 2019. Submissions can be sent directly to email@example.com and should be accompanied by a brief biography not to exceed 75 words.
The maximum number of submissions per writer is FIVE.
Writing should be submitted as a Word or PDF attachment. If you choose to submit a poetry meme, the meme must be accompanied by the text in a Word or PDF version.
Artwork for the Anthology is also being accepted and must be able to be reproduced clearly in black and white.
Questions? Contact Candice Daquin at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Thank you for your interest.
I just watched the amazing film Bohemian Rhapsody. Let me ask you something … if I begin this post with; “And I wanted to talk about being gay” How many of you would stop reading? Ask yourselves, what does that really say about you?
I want to talk about being gay. Watching the story of Freddie Mercury it struck me (again) how the tiny minority of people who are gay (not bisexual) still struggle. You may ask why or point to more worthy causes to talk about …
Imagine being 1/2 percent of the population. Maybe you already are. That’s how many women are lesbians and men are roughly 2/3 percent. Bisexuality is far more prevalent, however 85% of women who are bisexual end up married to man, which begs the question, is there such as thing as ‘true’ bisexuality’ or is there just a desire to play both sides until you settle down, invariably with someone of the same gender?
Either way, ‘true’ queer women are rare. For men, those who are bisexual tend to end up being with men. It begs the question – do these stats indicate being a lesbian is not a life style many people choose or want to adopt? Or simply, that most women have a tendency toward heterosexuality as their preference?
My unscientific viewpoint for what it’s worth is; Men who have sex with men tend to be with men maybe because to ‘go there’ is almost indelible? Whereas sexuality for women is more fluid, and whilst they may like having sex with another woman and find her attractive, it’s not enough of a hook. Is sexuality and gayness a preference? I don’t think so, which means the ‘true’ number of gays is smaller than we even credit.
I personally don’t understand why more men are gay than women, as I am biased and see a lot more to be attracted to in a woman than a man (although they are harder to go out with because they are more demanding and selfish and less romantic). Irrespective, a man who is attracted to men, doesn’t go back and forth as much, a woman who is attracted to women may well end up with a man as other considerations come into play. To me, this isn’t being gay – it’s just having fun. Maybe I’m saying being gay is massively different to being bisexual.
I would imagine the negatives about bisexuality are; judgment from both sides, and that’s about it. If you are totally gay then the negatives include persecution, ostracizing, not fitting in, having no role models, no representation and most of all – feeling weird because 99/98 percent of the world doesn’t ‘get’ you and where you are coming from.
How many times have I been told by a woman that they find other women attractive but they can’t really understand wanting to be with a woman for any length of time – interestingly not because of sex, most women like oral sex, but because of the high maintenance being with a woman entails and how nice it is when a man romances you. It is true, it’s rarer and finding it with a woman, well you often end up having to do all the work and while men are good at that, women aren’t as much.
Hence why of those relationships that last, the classical butch/femme roles tend to work out best because the lesbians who are butch want to imitate a man and romance the woman and the femme is happy. I realize that’s a negative stereotyping of female-female relationships but there is also some truth.
Thinking about the AIDS era (which has never entirely left us and now that there are new drugs that people can take to reduce their likelihood of HIV exposure, where’s the incentive to continue to practice safe sex?) and how many gay men (and others) died and the terrible things that were said about them and how generations exist now that know nothing of this and how it will be forgotten …
I remember I was very young but I heard people say things like; “AIDS is killing the queers its divine justice” That told me early on that gay people were not equal and would never be treated equally behind closed doors. At one point in my life I was in the closet because it was easier and unlike a person of color, a gay person can often be in the closet to avoid prejudice. I’d not been in the closet before and suddenly I was privy to the things straight people said about gays when they didn’t think one of them was listening. I realized that this had all been said of me when I wasn’t in the closet but behind my back.
Then the other aspect to consider is the gay community and how judging and excluding it can be and how for many queers, fitting in with their own gay ‘family’ doesn’t always come easy or at all. I personally tend not to get on with gays, I have found them to often possess the worst traits of heterosexuals which deeply disappoints me. Lesbians judge you for not being queer enough, or act like swaggering men. Gay men can be such divas that they own the sarcasm and bitchiness in the room.
Does it mean you’re a ‘bad’ queer if you don’t feel in with ‘your people’? And yet … why assume just because you share one thing in common, you’ll get along? I’m sure I share something in common with Trump as well … point made.
The female gay world is divided into sections, either you’re a successful, educated career person in which case you go to exclusive things and judge those who are not on your level. You only date those who are like you, and you have high expectations as well as demanding those women you date are athletic, social and above all, status and financially successful.
The other group are the more neighborhood based gays, and the clubs teem with liars, frauds and fakes alongside players, druggies and alcoholics. If you imagine being heterosexual and reducing the number of options you have from roughly 48% to 1/2% you probably wouldn’t find someone you liked either. And let’s for not forget, if you’re straight and you see someone in the street or anywhere, you can essentially flirt with them without fear. But how can you tell when someone may be gay? Contrary to popular opinion, the gay-dar doesn’t work THAT well. So you are further restricted to mind-reading, falling in love with heterosexuals or going to gay clubs where the worst reside.
Boo Hoo right? A hard life. But not nearly as hard as many others. Combine that with a co-morbidity of higher rates of depression/anxiety (no wonder) and all the accompanying aspects that may accompany homosexuality and a life time of being shamed, ridiculed, the odd one out, and it’s not simply one issue, it’s everything.
There have been times I wished fervently not to be gay. I got fed-up of having a crush on my straight friend who wouldn’t like me if I were the last person standing, I saw how well men can treat women, I envied the heterosexual world. That’s why being gay is no choice, as most who had one, wouldn’t choose it.
That said it’s not all negative. Some of the best parts of my life have been as a result of being gay. Watching the film on Freddie Mercury really affected me profoundly because it reminded me that only a few years ago in my city there were stickers condemning gays having the right to marry, that my own life has been severely disrupted/destroyed for several reasons related to being gay, and how many gays have suffered over the years.
I may not be a huge fan of this modern world – 2018 onward – and I may hark beck to ‘better’ eras as I perceive them, BUT I know things are improving for gays and I hope one day, being gay is not something that will pull you down and give you pain. It will be what it is meant to be, a natural minority who see things differently but are in every other way part of us all.
Spare a thought for gays even as you think they have all their rights now and should stop complaining. It is not as simple as possessing rights. Gays are still more likely to commit suicide, have addictions, mental illness, be ostracized from family and be beaten up and murdered. Gays can often be very isolated, their pain not taken seriously, and feel alone even among ‘their kind’ and it really does make a difference to us when someone, irrespective of gender, befriends us and likes us for who we are, without being uncomfortable around us.
A friend for a gay person has twice the value because we never take it for granted and we always feel so lucky. After all, most of us living, remember a time when admitting you were gay would guarantee nobody would be your friend. Therefore, thank you for all who show kindness to us, and remember, compassion is the only thing that compensates for the erstwhile damage human beings have historically wrought, both on minorities of all kinds and our planet.
I dream of a world where it will be okay to walk down the street and not worry about holding hands with the person you love, when it will be comfortable to kiss someone you’re with, in public, without fearing being beaten up. Just as women worldwide, dream of walking down a street without being raped. I believe this day can come, if all of us have the patience to see the value of talking about this and not saying ‘I’m so fed up with the gay agenda or the feminist agenda’ and switching off. Until we have true equality, the only thing we can do is bring awareness and hope in turn, it produces change.
Oh, and to those bisexuals? Yeah. Sorry. But on the other hand, I’ve got a point. Can’t you sometimes choose the girl? 😉
Go see Bohemian Rhapsody. It’s incredible.
I knew my invisibility when the lady next to my mother in the nursing ward took me in her arms out of pity for there was nobody there who cared to rock a crying child , who was not wanted by hedonists who erred in pregnancy I knew my invisibility when my mother tucked bus […]