Sorrow
You come from the juxtapose of joy
As I ate words of love
I had been starving for
Felt your surround like a glory
My body opening for the first time in years
To the rain of you and your outstretched us.
That safe place
Didn’t really exist
I had simply been running in diminishing blindfolds
Emptying myself of protest just as, in one glance, you fill me whole
Anything less is biding time before dying
And it’s not good enough! I want to feel FIRE.
I am
I said into darkness
A strange person
I spent my youth
Acting multiple roles
Watching the stage from ceilings
And words? You have none, I have plenty
But they mean nothing
The purity of your act
Holding my chin and neck
As only one who owns my heart
Tells me more than any soliloquy.
I am a writer
Who doesn’t believe in detail
I’ve had the most fantastic actors
And I’ve seen through them all
But your raw silent search
Slams me with its reality
And I open and open and open
Crying out my betrayal and my hurt
Your fingers beneath my arching
The feel of you, deep in my journey.
Like a wild wind
I pull hard on you
Because I cannot have enough
I want you to live inside me
Like a flower touching my soul, blooms in darkness
Our fingers interlaced
Things I’ll never be able to say.
I smell home in your neck
I touch pain against bliss
And collapse on the other side
Where all meaning resides and you …
You are my all
I want to stay here
Gathered into you and afraid
Because when you feel
You always walk the edge of a blade
Sharp and unknown.
I cannot say anything
But the feel of you against me, is my only sense
I am driven
Like sea is drawn magnetically, every morning
Thundering against shore or stone
Grieving its former peace momentarily
Before losing in the din and rage of passion
All ordinary sense, replaced with certainty.
I am unable to exist without
The burn of following
I follow you
As we are shadows separate and together
Watching me watching you, merge and turn like slivers of ink
Until one, until none
Indivisible we begin over
Unweaving what was you from my depths
Incomplete now
Stay
Stay
Stay please
Always.